I Feel Lost
Sometimes.
I faced a rejection yesterday. It was not the worst, nor my first. But it hit me like nothing else hit me before.
And it got me thinking a lot of things. It has barely been a day since it happened. But my mind has been thinking things ever since the interview.
It got me questioning my daily habits, how I manage my time, and whether I’ve been focused enough lately, and pretty much everything that I do.
Igniting a string of thoughts taking off from “How could I not know this?” to “I don’t think I can do this.”
One incident triggers such deep, intense, and worrying thoughts. Weird.
And I’ve felt lost like this many times before. For a lot of reasons.
But yesterday was different.
Instead of getting upset, I felt like I questioned everything for good.
I’m not sitting in a corner or lying in my blanket, feeling bad about myself.
I’m in my room, sitting on my chair. Reading. Writing. Working. For myself.
Making sure I don’t flunk another interview.
Maybe sometimes we need life to shove the reality down our throat. Something more than the sight of a fear dangling right in front of your eyes. To get you off your ass and start working.
